Monday, January 25, 2010

Universal Soldier: Regeneration DVD Review

THE REUNION OF THE GUY FROM KICKBOXER & THE GUY FROM ROCKY IV………YEP, A NEW UNIVERSAL SOLDIER MOVIE THAT NOBODY REALLY WANTED.

I feel like I have been brainwashed into thinking the first Universal Soldier movie was actually a good film. When in fact, it really wasn't. It was just far better than any of the follow ups (whether they were the direct-to-cable sequels or the official sequels) That’s right, there are actually 2 different sequels to Universal Soldier 2 & 3. I remember trying to watch the made-for-cable versions but just could not do it. I did go to the theaters to see Universal Soldier: The Return , which was an utter crap-fest of a film and as bad as that sequel was, I still had a little hope for some cheesy fun when I heard that Jean-Claude Van Damme & Dolph Lundgren were both returning for Universal Soldier: Regeneration.

Within the first few minutes of the movie I already knew this was going to be a complete bore. It has that same vibe as most direct-to-dvd Van-Damme movies and Shot overseas in Bulgaria on a very limited budget.. My main curiosity for wanting to watch this movie was to see how the hell they were going to bring back the Andrew Scott character (Dolph Lundgren) considering he was torn to pieces in the first movie. I will not spoil it for the reader, but it was really lame. Another thing is that we find Luc Deveraux (Van Damme) being recently thawed out and in physical and mental therapy, trying to be reintroduced into the real world as a normal person. But wasn’t he already brought back to normal in Universal Soldier: The Return ? That made no sense to me. Here is another thing that may get fans of the U.S. Films. Van Damme & Lundgren are probably in the movie for less than 20 minutes total between them. Dolph does not show up until the last 15 minutes and the confrontation you are waiting to see between the 2 stars is only a few minutes long.

I have not even gotten to the plot of the film (like it really f*ckin matters at this point) Here it goes, Terrorists have kidnapped the children of a political figure and demanding that their people are released from prison or the children will be killed. The terrorists have also created a next-generation Universal Soldier (played by former UFC Heavyweight Champion Andrei "The Pit Bull" Arlovski) And his acting is just good enough to play an emotion free killing machine. So the U.S. Government forcefully recruit Luc Deveraux (Van Damme) to go into the Chernobyl nuclear reactor and defuse the bombs that have been sent and rescue the children. I cannot really tell you how Andrew Scott comes into play without ruining the whole reason he is in the movie but, honestly it's no big deal. Universal Soldier: Regeneration is a very low grade direct-to-dvd sequel to a movie that wasn’t that good to begin with, but there are suckers out there who will want to see this for themselves, like myself. I recommend you at least wait till you can catch it on cable if you really must see it.

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